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Danny 1987[/caption]

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Welcome back My Dear Readers to The Other Shoe. I am writing this article at midnight Wednesday, going into Thursday the 25^th. I am writing this article because there are some things I would like to ‘get off my chest’. Sometimes I write these ‘Notes’ articles and then never publish. I won’t know if this is one of those or that I will publish this edition until tomorrow… when I wake up and decide. Today was, admittedly, a difficult day from the start.

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You see, My Dear Readers, I had planned on visiting my Oncologist (Cancer Doctor) today. I had broken down, under pressure from Allen and another friend here in California, to go back and talk to my Oncologist about treatment. However, when I got up this morning… without telling us (or notifying via phone call, email or message varied by bird) the whole parking area in front of our apartment had been… … … repaved! That’s right, right in front of our apartment the parking area and the entrance into the building had all been repaved overnight. I could not see any way to get out to my ‘Para-Transit’ ride or any way for the bus to get into the apartment area to pick me up. I was greatly frustrated and told Allen that I was just going to call and cancel.

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Allen, knowing how difficult it was to convince me to go in the first place, told me to wait. He was going to the office to ask if there was ‘any way out, and a way for the bus to come in and pick me up…’. The OCTA bus was not scheduled to arrive until 12:47-1:27PM PST so I figured, since it was only 8AM, I had time to wait and see what the management told Allen. Thirty minutes passed, and Allen came back to the apartment. First, he told me that he had to go ‘upstairs to go around the pavement, then around the building to the other side, then back down the stairs and back around to the office’. To get back home, he had to reverse the process, going up and down stairs backward from the way he went out. The managed told Allen that “everybody must go upstairs, around the building, then back down stairs to get and out of this part of the building.” Allen told the manage that “Danny has an appointment with his Oncologist TODAY and he must use his power chair… we cannot get the Power Chair up and down stairs in order to follow their convoluted path…” The manager told Allen “I don’t know what to tell you. Danny must use the stairs to get out. Anyone using the pavement, before Thursday, will be evicted.”

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To enforce their insane and draconian policy, they had several of the maintenance staff positioned around the building monitoring people’s movements. There, simply, was no way Allen and I were getting myself and my Power Chair; up two flights of stairs, down two flights of stairs, then reversing the procedure once we get home from the doctor’s appointment. Therefore, I was forced to cancel, yet another, visit to my Oncologist. Allen had to drag me kicking and screaming to this appointment. I do not know if he will get me to schedule another appointment. FYI I did not reschedule the missed appointment, today. Don’t tell Allen, but I just do not ‘see’ how we can afford to go and… well, do all the things that they want… now.

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That was how my day started. Then I get on line and I am going to ‘publish’ the ‘Lost in Space’ ‘Review’ of the ‘Tour of Our Solar System’ I have planned for this week. Yesterday, I spend several HOURS working on; writing, embedding links to the older articles, embedding images from the older articles into the newer article, then editing the article, then publishing (uploading the text part), then incorporating the images with the text, then proofing, then setting the automatic publish for the article. I did that last part just in case my day was so busy that I did not have time to get on line and press publish. So, the article (the review) posted without a hitch on Word Press location of The Other Shoe. Yet, over at my (primary) blog location at Blog Dot Com the article did NOT publish as scheduled.

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Looking back, I do not believe that it has ever ‘automatically’ published as scheduled at the Blog Dot Com location. Now, as if that is not enough to get my goat. I go to check the article so I bring up the word processing software for the blog and upload the article as (I thought) I had left it. Low and behold… IT IS BLANK! That’s right, as soon as the article fully loaded I was met with a nearly completely blank page! All that was on the page was the very first image the ‘Map of Our Solar System’! Everything else was, somehow, gone! Disappeared since I saw the article last at 2AM. Hours upon hours of work… GONE! Now, My Dear Readers, I am not and ‘angry’ man. In my youth, and for awhile after my head injury, I was a bit of an angry man. I would fly off the handle, I could get frustrated pretty easily, and I had a propensity for vulgarity. By the time I was 3o’ish I had done my best to leave all that behind me. I realized that anger’ only hurts the angry person. As well, it damages your health, shortens your life, makes living with you unpalatable for most people, and generally makes you and the people around you unhappy. I have done my very best to put and keep that ‘angry’ person behind me for good.

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However, today… I was tempted terribly. Like I have stated there was, at least, three hours of work just gone! I had to; upload the text part again, embed images from all the older articles again, proof read the article again. Then put in all the final touches which includes; embedding the applet for my Indiegogo campaign, embed the eBay logo, place linked text for eBay and Indiegogo, add my final picture at the end of the article and copy/paste my ‘© Hanning Web Wurx and The Other Shoe’ at the very end of the article. All told, I spend another two hours on an article posting I had spent three to four. You see, My Dear Readers, I ended up expending the patience and energy that I had planned on using up writing an all new episode of ‘The Horror in Smithville’ for later this week or next week. However, since I had to expend two more hours for a project I had already put to bed? I am/was not of the mind or energy to write that all new… content.

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Truthfully? I am having a LOT of problems with the; editing, uploading, uploading new images, editing articles, uploading text, and working on articles old and new at the (primary) blog location at Blog Dot Com. If I had my druthers? I would move the primary blog to another location. If I had the money? I would purchase: The Other Shoe.com or The Other Shoe.net, or The Other Shoe.blog and I would purchase; web hosting, blog software for my computers, and get everything I need to just host and maintain my primary blog MYSELF! That is what I have wanted for the past two years.

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Honestly, I barely have enough money to house and feed Allen and myself. We do not have enough money to spend for my ‘vanity project’ that is my blog. Seriously, I was hoping that there just might be enough money (left over out of the campaign) that I could get rid of Blog Dot Com… NOW! Truthfully, $280 is just not going to do it. If $280 is all I raise? Then I will be forced to start the campaign all over again! I cannot just quit on my battle with cancer, forever. I can put it off until I have the needed funds. However, each and every week… every month… I wait to start treatment? Well, that takes time off ‘the other end’ of my life. As well, by waiting and waiting, I am risking allowing this cancer to ‘dig in’ to the point that I might need to have several ‘Lines’ of treatment just to get this thing beat back… enough.

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Yet, My Dear Readers, I can only do what I can do, no more no less. I know that a lot of people think that I just ‘pulled the number $25OK “Out of Thin Air’ for the campaign’. I did not. IF one were to read the whole ‘Mission Statement’ for Danny’s Cancer Treatment Fund at Indiegogo [1] they would quickly see that I have done my best to audit my campaign’s goal. I have figured for the cost of; transportation – Either months of Para-Transit OR a lump sum for purchase of a van/Car able to transport my power chair and myself, cost of extra medications not covered by my Part D Medicare provider, medications of a holistic nature to minimize the negative effects of the chemotherapy drugs, money to offset all the hours Allen will loose from his (two) jobs to- Take me to and from all appointments-stay at home with me after chemotherapy when I am most weak and/or nauseous, offset rent money lost, and/or figured in cost of moving to a batter place for Allen and I to live IF I manage to get through how ever many courses of (lines) of chemotherapy and/or Radiation therapy. My Dear Readers, I figured all the possible expenses for all lines of treatment ahead of time.

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Quite honestly I do not want to be running a campaign, writing seven or more articles EVERY WEEK for months, all at the same time as I am dealing with a second or third line of chemotherapy! I just concluded that it would be better to try and gather all the support while I have more STRENGTH! I now realize that the majority of people did not understand my strategy and (most likely) just saw what I was trying to do as GREEDY! I have no one else but myself to blame. However, IF PEOPLE HAD READ… MORE then they would have understood my reasoning, my strategy and would have actually seen what I am trying to do as ‘smart’ and ‘Thinking AHEAD’. Something I have failed to DO most of my adult LIFE! But, I am trying to do Better. I am trying to be a better ADULT. I am working hard to be a better person, provide better for my family, and head off unexpected emergencies so that I am less of a drain on my family and FRIENDS. Though all I can see now is that my plan backfired… people are just seeing me a greedy and weak and the last thing they will ever do Is take the time to READ and understand my reasoning. It is a horrible shame that may well result in a cancer (that IS TREATABLE) taking my life rather soon.

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Finally, My Dear Readers, I was told (by someone that I respect and admire) that if I might have to run another campaign.. ro, like, extend THIS campaign that I should notify people ASAP! Therefore, My Dear Readers, IF I do NOT make at least ¼ of my $25K GOAL? (= $6,400.00) then I will be forced to run ANOTHER Indiegogo Campaign as soon as Mid-October! I know that a lot of people will never READ so they will never understand. That is so unfortunate… so… bad for me. Yet, My Dear Readers, I simply MUST TRY! Of all the people in the world I understand my needs… the financial demands of this cancer… BETTER than anyone else in the world.

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THAT, My Dear Readers, brings us to the end of this article, for today. I hope that I have opened some eyes, and shared some insight. It is always my intent to share, and inform. Never to judge or inflame. My words are just that, MY words. Nothing more, and certainly nothing less. I look forward to seeing you here, later today, and again tomorrow. On FRIDAY there WILL be an episode of ‘The Horror in Smithville’!!! IF I am feeling up to it… and my campaign has progressed to the point I am not forced to push it up the hill every hour? I Will edit and upload MORE of ‘The Horror in Smithville’! Perhaps we can even come to the END of ‘Part 14’ THIS WEEK!

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As always it is a pleasure to write for you and share with you.

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Adieu!

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Thank YOU!
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Danny's Cancer Treatment Fund @ Indiegogo